Former Belgian Prime Minister Herman Von Rompuy is the surprise choice as the EU’s first President. One of the things he’s most famous for (well, to be honest, to only thing he’s even slightly famous for) is the fact that he writes haikus. A haiku is a poem with just 17 syllables, arranged 5, 7 and 5.
Conveying one’s thoughts via a haiku makes Twitterers look like chatterboxes.
(The haiku is never one of the categories in a game of charades, and here’s why:
*Stands, holds left fist a couple of inches above inverted right fist like a Town Crier reading from a scroll, trying to mime a person holding a small piece of paper drenched in lavender water…*
*Sits temporarily so can hold up two hands and one and a half feet…*
*Contestants: “…seventeen syllables…”
*Stands again, holds up two hands and a foot, overbalances and then stands back up holding one ear…*
*Contestants: “…fifteenth syllable, sounds like…”
It could take a while).
Anyway, in honour of Mr Von Rompuy I am publishing some of his work. After Ireland passed the Lisbon Treaty (on the second vote, which if you think about it was a replay, even though they’d said before the first vote that there wouldn’t be a replay (leave it Tinman, time to move on, sorry, yes, you’re right)), Mr Von Rompuy wrote this:
The treaty has passed
I would be more excited
If I had read it.
Upon his election to the Presidency he wrote this:
I don’t have much flair
But I still got elected
Because I’m not Blair.
Finally, the drawback to this form of communication is illustrated by this last effort, where he outlines his ideas for getting the EU out of recession:
The EU is fecked.
Do not fret, I have a plan.
What I will do is
We wish him the best of luck.