Party Piece

Office party, pa-ruh-pa-pum-pum,
The first two hours you all stand there looking glum
The conversation is a big tedium
Until you start to feel the coke and the rum
Go to your tum
Making you numb
You’ve lost all dignity and all decorum
Trouble will come.

Two hours later, pa-ruh-pa-pum-pum
You’re lacking all of your equilibrium
Your head is spinning like a dwarf being swung
You tell the HR Head that she’s your best chum
Really best chum
Bestesht besht chum
Then, you slip and fall straight onto your bum
Really dumb.

Sunday morning, pa-ruh-pa-pum-pum
Inside your head an elf is banging a drum
There’s waves of nausea coming ad nauseam
You fearfully look at social medium –
You swear that next year you’ll drink a minimum –
This is hokum.


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