Photographers who struggle with WordPress’s Weekly Photo Challenge should try having a computer that will no longer let you load photos from your mobile onto it. In such a situation most people would retire defeated, but I am not most people, I am an idiot. So from now until I get some 21st century equipment I’m going to treat the Photo Challenge as a writing challenge…..
It took just one fleeting moment. Maybe it was the cosmic dust that caused it. Anyway, for whatever reason, God sneezed.
“Bless you,” said Gabriel. God looked at him.
“What?” said Gabriel. “It’s an expression.”
God had never sneezed before, and therefore was unaware that One has to put something to One’s nose if One is to avoid possible embarrassment. He and Gabriel suddenly noticed the small ball of blue-green snot that was drifting slowly across space.
“Er, I’ll clean that up for you,” said Gabriel.
“No, wait a sec,” said God. The ball had begun to revolve around a star, close enough to it to start to warm the ball up. Even as they stared, small stirrings began in what is known, very accurately, as the Primordial Ooze.
“It’s alive,” whispered Gabriel, like a Frankenstein’s Igor.
God stared in fascination at it. “I’m going to put beings on it,” he said.
“What kind of beings?” asked Gabriel.
“I’m going to create, er, man,” said God.
“What does that mean?”
“It means ‘word I just made up’. This man will be created in mine own image.”
“What, a million feet tall and totally invisible?”
“No, he will have eyes, ears -”
“-and a nose -”
“Yes, and a nose, just like me.”
“What will he do all day? There’s not a lot of fun to be had on your own on a ball of snot.”
“He won’t be alone,” said God. “He will have a mate.”
“What, like the way you and me are mates?” asked Gabriel.
“Not exactly. Eventually there will be lots of mans.”
“Will they live in the clouds?”
“Will they have wings?”
“Will they be immortal?”
“They sound a bit pathetic,” said Gabriel.
They do, don’t they, thought God. He looked into their future. He saw wars, and cruelties, and petty stupidity, and half thought of giving up the whole idea. But he looked a bit deeper. He saw music, and poetry, and the astonishing creation that is laughter. He saw warmth, and kindness, and he saw love.
“They won’t be pathetic,” he said proudly. “They’ll be magnificent.”