Name Dropping

Sidey’s Weekend Theme is “the decision”…


“No way.”

“I’m sorry, I’ve made my decision.”

“Well unmake it,” said Dick Grayson. “There is no way that I’m going to be called Robin.”

“I don’t see why not,” said Batman. “It’s an excellent name.”

“It’s a dork’s name,” said Robin. “Let me present Batman – the Dark Knight, Thor – the Thunder God, and Robin – the Guy Who Looks Good On Christmas Cards.”

“No, you’ll have a proper nickname,” said Batman. “You’re going to be Robin – the Boy Wonder.”

“I am twenty-six years old,” said Dick icily, so icily in fact that it’s a pity that the name “Iceman” was taken. “Look, it’s not cool. In a world full of people called The Green Hornet, Wolverine and Captain America, I would be the equivalent of the Boy Named Sue.”

“And what would you suggest?”

“Well, what I’ve thinking,” said Dick, “is that I’m going to be a super-hero, and my name -”

“We’re not calling you SuperDick,” said Batman flatly.

Dick, as he would be known for the last time, sighed. “Ok, Robin it is then. Knowing my luck we’ll meet a villain called The Sparrow, with his bow-and-arrow.”

“Ok, that’s settled,” said Batman.

“But do me one favour. Just explain to me how you picked it?”

“Well, fortunately I had my Bat Random Name Generator -”

“Don’t talk shite,” snapped Robin. “There’s no such thing, and we both know it.”

“I found it in a Book of Baby Names,” admitted Batman.

“Very scientific. Come to that, how did you come up with your own name? Spider-man I get, the Riddler I get, but why Batman? Can you navigate by echo?”

“I must admit I had problems,” said Batman. “Most of the good names where taken. I flirted with the idea of Toyman, and toyed with the idea of Flirtman. I thought of wearing a metal breastplate and calling myself Tinman -”

“Stupid name,” said Robin.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought. Then finally it hit me.”

“What did?”

“A baseball bat,” said Batman. “It fell off the top shelf where I kept it.”

“Pity it wasn’t an umbrella,” said Robin. “You could have called yourself “Rain Man”.”

7 thoughts on “Name Dropping

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