Underline This

No matter what I write here Spellcheck will invariably find something to draw its red squiggly lines under, as if it were a teacher with an overenthusiastic red pen and I was a particularly inept pupil.

The fact that it doesn’t recognise word “blogging” particularly annoys me, as it makes me feel as if my hobby is one of those really esoteric ones, like numismatics or speleology, neither of which, by the way, it recognises either.

Of course the obvious thing to so is to simply add the word to its dictionary, so yesterday evening I clicked the “Spelling and Grammar” button. It informed me, as I knew it would, that blogging was not a word, and offered me the alternatives “bogging”, “logging”, “flogging”, “clogging” and “slogging”.

While I know what the phrase “bogged down” means I am a bit doubtful about the word “bogging”, and would hate to think that I have spent the last three years doing it. Perhaps I am bogging down (or up?) the internet.

There are other words it could have suggested, such as “cogging”, “dogging”, fogging“, “hogging”, ”jogging” (perhaps it knows me too well by now to imagine that I could possibly mean that), “togging” or “snogging” (really sadly, it has just put a red line under “snogging”, which might explain why it is always so vicious with its red pen).

There are also these:

Frogging: the effect that a cold has upon one’s voice;
Grogging: Spellcheck keeps trying to change this to gorging, and to some extent it’s right – grogging is overindulgence in cheap rum;
Llogging: cutting down trees, in Wales.
Ogging: finding any excuse, at any time of the day, to drink and then sing lewd songs, like Nanny Ogg from the Terry Pratchett books;
Sogging: over-watering a plant;
And zogging: trying to take over the universe, like General Zog. It is a synonym of cowelling, which takes its name from Simon Cowell.

Believe me, Spellcheck has not enjoyed the last nine lines of this post.

5 thoughts on “Underline This

  1. Patti

    Spellcheck is clearly not a native Californian, where we have to do “smogging” (also red-lined) – which is not the act of polluting, but rather the act of having bi-annual checks on our vehicles to make sure they are not polluting more than absolutely necessary. We don’t have any other type of required inspection – the car can have a cracked windshield and bald tires – it just has to pass the emissions test.

    My favorite from your list – lloging.

  2. Pseu

    I’m completely boggled by this blagging- nearly to the point of logging off. Or even blogging off. Better than bogging off, I suppose.
    (Spell chequer has not underlined any of these. Except ‘chequer’. And that’s a real word. I think. Though spilling’s not my string point. )

  3. vivinfrance

    You are a man after my own heart. I too have tried to add words to the dictionary – words like Wordle and clerihew. I gave up and now take perverse delight in using esoteric words the ignorant beast has never heard of. Teasing a spellcheck is about as productive as taking the p…s out of WordPress prompts, but both can be childishly satisfying!


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