Handbags and Sad Tags

The page that appears after you have published something in WordPress to tell you that you’re “far-out!“ (or “Boss!” as it told me yesterday) does more than just that. It lists the tags and categories you used in a post that you published just half-a-second earlier, implying that you have the memory of a goldfish, and then says “to get more traffic, why not add these tags:”

Some of their suggestions are quite bizarre. After my “Autumn” photo challenge, for example, it suggested that I add “bales of hay”.

And after my post a couple of days ago about the perfect sandwich its suggestions were “toasted cheese“, “lava lamp“, “French stick“, “film character“…. and “navel fluff“.

Do they really believe that they will get me more traffic? I mean, just who would be loser enough to Google “navel fluff”?

Anyway, I have Googled “navel fluff”.

There is a Wikipedia site, of course, a font of information for those of us who would not otherwise know what navel fluff is. It tells us that it is also known as navel lint, belly button lint, belly button fluff and pupik lint. While I might have guessed at the others I didn’t know the last one, though I can’t see myself using it in conversation, I’d have to explain what I was talking about and it would look as if I was showing off, and a man who has to show off about about knowing an esoteric word for navel fluff is a man in need of professional help.

The scary thing is that it is not the first site on the list. It is topped by Graham Barker’s Navel Fluff Collection, which is “the incredible world of navel fluff (lint), featuring the world’s biggest and longest-term collection of an individual’s navel fluff, with photos”.

I have not clicked into the site. There are some dark places where a man just should not go.

Anyway, I have added the suggested tags, and if I find that people really are coming here after typing “navel fluff” then future posts will also include the tags “earwax” and “toenail clippings”.

After all, even if all I all I attract are nutters, traffic is traffic.

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11 thoughts on “Handbags and Sad Tags

  1. Pseu

    I could tell you a thing or two about navels and what can be found in them . But you’d probably not want to know. Let’s just say it is important to keep the button clean and defluffed daily. It’s up to you whether you start collecting it (Eurch).

    The amazing thing about that collection (http://www.feargod.net/fluff.html) is the change in colour of the said fluff over time.

    Reply
    1. Pseu

      brave or daft?

      It’s only fluff in his specimen jars, but a different colour over the years. Probably due to the colour of his favourite jumper….

      Reply
  2. Tilly Bud

    The problem page of the South African Sunday Times once had this Q & A. I remember it because, well, you’ll see why:

    Q: Every time I stick my finger in my belly button, it smells. What should I do?

    A: Stop sticking your finger in your belly button.

    Reply
  3. A Frend

    The colour of navel fluff is a reliable indicator of health. In a healthy adult male, it is blue, although it can verge towards grey without causing too much concern. Any other colour and you should probably go to the doctor.
    Well known fact.

    Reply
  4. Janie Jones

    Pupik lint. Is that what baby dogs would have in their belly buttons if they had them? And, now I think of it, do baby dogs have belly buttons and I’ve never noticed?

    Oh now I have to go investigate my dog. And you know I have nothing better to do….

    Reply

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