One of the phrases beloved of new parents is the phrase “sleeping through”.
I well remember it, even though it seems like a million years ago. It and two other phrases cropped up in every conversation, with everybody, since our new-born child was the only thing we were interested in conversing about. The other two were “settle” (“how long does it take him to settle?”) and “lift him” (“we only have to lift him about twice during the night”).
“Sleepingthrough” was a magical and at times it seemed mythical state, like Neverland or Narnia, or Level 4 on our Company Career Path (sorry, quick bitch about work there). Whenever Tinson1 arrived at the state of Sleepingthrough there would be joy, bliss and celebration within the Tinhouse, as we would at last be able sleep all night ourselves, and wouldn’t fall asleep leaning against bus shelters (I actually did this, and woke up to find my bus had gone).
(I have just re-read the previous paragraph, and feel I must make just one comment. When Sleepingthrough occurs you do indeed get a full night’s sleep, but not on the first night. On the first night both of you lie awake terrified, wondering why he hasn’t woken. You continually creep up to his cot and lean in as near to him as possible, trying to ensure that you can hear him breathe. Eventually you poke him awake just to be sure).
Anyway, sleeping through is a Good Thing when it happens to new-born babies. With 52-year old men, not so much.
I got home from work yesterday at about six. I went into the bedroom to change, lay down on the bed for a few seconds, and woke up this morning. No brilliant post, no delicious dinner (hi Mrs Tin, if you’re reading), no meaningful bonding with the Tinkids (“How are things?” “Fine.” How was your day?” “Fine.” “How was school?” “Fine.”). Just twelve hours of what was basically one step down from unconsciousness. Not only that, I actually had to be woken by my alarm this morning, which almost never happens.
I didn’t sleep flat on my back with my fists up beside my ears, and my legs forming a diamond shape with the soles of my feet resting against each other. Other than that, though, I slept like a baby.