Daddy Long-Legs

In a conversation with QuietScotsGirl and myself, TallNeuroticGirl told us she is planning to buy her dad a suit for Christmas.

QSG said she would not feel confident in selecting a suit for her dad, but then TNG’s dad is a farmer from Longford, so presumably there is just the one type of suit called “farmer’s suit”, with large pinstripes and a row of biros in the breast pocket, and all she’ll have to decide is whether to accessorize it with a cap or a hat.


TNG's dad

And she’ll have to pick the right size. And this is where her problem arises, because her mum insists that her dad has a 39-inch leg. TNG has tried telling her that nobody has a 39-inch leg (and believe me, if TNG doesn’t, then no-one does) but her mum is adamant.

QSG asked does he wear trousers up to his nipples, á la Simon Cowell. I suggested that TNG should buy a pair of 39-inch trousers, if there are any such things, just so she can say “I told you so”, when he waddles around like a diver wearing flippers.

And then, because all this depersonalised crap has dulled my Inappropriateness Sensor ever so slightly, I heard myself say “of course, your mum only thinks your dad has 39-inch legs because he has told her that this (holding my hands about four inches apart) is nine inches”.

Fortunately she laughed. Still, I have to cure this somehow.

6 thoughts on “Daddy Long-Legs

  1. Jo

    I”m totally personalised and I still do that all the time. I actually think it’s blogging – you get used to a certain freedom of rudeness for the sale of a laugh. And people being open with eachother, when they wouldn’t face to face.

    And I already have a problem due to what I think is dyspraxia.

    Oh, the syndromes.

    You have snow! It’s snowing in your comment box!

  2. laughykate

    In my brain, buying my father a suit for Christmas is up there with ‘buying my father a guinea pig for Christmas’ or ‘buying my father a bling necklace’ or ‘buying my father someone else’s debt.’ It simply would not occur to me.

  3. morgor

    I bought my sister a bra for christmas.

    It’s unusual buying underwear for a sister, but then again she bought lube for my brother and his wife last year for a laugh, so i don’t feel so odd.


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